Loss is always hard…
Yesterday I learned my aunt passed away and my heart began to break. She and my uncle were incredible sources of support and encouragment during my estrangement from my parents. They demonstrated unconditional love and acceptance all these years and I’ve been so grateful. They nearly leapt with joy when they heard my mom and I were finally seeing each other last summer. It was amazing how they could remain separately supportive of my mom and me. They let me take the journey I needed…in my own time.
They lived in Hawaii when I was growing up, so I rarely spent time with them before my high school years. As an adult, I’ve made an effort to see them as frequently as possible, and I always took my kids on an annual spring trip to spend several days. But of course, it’s never enough.
They modeled a delightful and sweet marriage…always speaking highly of each other, not raising their voices with one another, and clearly enjoying each other’s company.
I’m deeply saddened by the loss, but comforted because she knew the Lord.
I worry now about my uncle, who was entirely devoted to caring for his bride of 65 years. Her health had been declining over the years and he willingly took on more responsibilities as became necesary to care for her. Life will be shockingly different with this role gone.
We’ll be driving to Oregon for the service Wednesday, then flying to Alaska Thursday to spend some time with my mom. (which, ironically, was already scheduled to happen.)
It’s an emotional week ahead. I will probably be out of the blogging loop for several days, returning eager for you to help me heal.
Mar 27, 2013 @ 06:24:26
It was wonderful that you had these loved ones to support you when you needed it, and doubly wonderful that you made sure your children got a piece of their wisdom too. Best wishes —
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Mar 27, 2013 @ 08:21:52
Thank you, Julia. I am very grateful my kids have had so many opportunities with my aunt and uncle.
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Mar 05, 2013 @ 15:28:09
I’m so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Take care.
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Mar 03, 2013 @ 20:57:47
Denise: I’m so sorry for your loss! I’m glad you had the blessing of your aunt and uncle in your life. I know you will be, even at a distance, a blessing to your uncle as well. Peace, and good travels. Diane
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Feb 28, 2013 @ 23:29:31
Denise, I am sorry for your loss. I have an aunt that was my big support also so I know what you must feel. Lots of prayers. Hoping you can remember all the wonderful things you did together. The memories of her love for you will help get you through it!
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Feb 28, 2013 @ 17:48:19
My condolences. Peace to you in this time.
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Feb 27, 2013 @ 14:58:27
I’m sorry. But I am glad she was able to see you and your mom reconnect. Hugs. Kate
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Feb 27, 2013 @ 13:50:35
So, sorry for your loss. I hope your fond memories will help you in this time of sadness.
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Feb 27, 2013 @ 07:51:15
So sorry for your loss. Your cherished memories of your Aunt will bring you comfort and joy in time; such a blessing that you had a close relationship with her and your Uncle. I will pray for you as you travel and also spend time with your Mom.
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Feb 27, 2013 @ 07:45:22
Denise,
I’m so sorry about your aunt. It sounds like you were very blessed by your uncle and aunt throughout your life, and I know how hard it is to lose someone so special. I’ll be praying for you and your family. May God’s amazing comfort and grace sustain you as you honor and celebrate your aunt’s life with your family…
call me anytime…
Love, Lori
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Feb 27, 2013 @ 04:46:51
Sorry for your troubles. It always seems like they take a piece of you with them doesn’t it? Be brave.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 23:58:06
((((((((((Denise+Michelle)))))))))) — BIG HUG for the two of you.
I have been told that in some (or all? ) Native American languages, there is no word for “aunt.” The First Nation people call their aunt: “Other Mother.”
I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Other Mother.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 21:14:44
Much love to you Denise. I hope this pain passes soon for you, and blessings to your aunt and uncle.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 18:59:37
I’m so sorry for your loss, Denise. Your aunt sounds like she was a wonderful woman and this must be devastating for you…
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 18:41:04
God bless you Denise, my prayers and thoughts are with you and your family. Blessings and hugs..
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 17:16:04
Losing a beloved family member is always difficult. I’m glad your aunt was able to see you and your mother reestablish contact. It seems that must have been a wonderful feeling for her.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 17:06:51
I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your Aunt. A lovely lady who understood you better than your own mother. My Aunt was the same with me as well. Sounds like she had a love-filled and fulfilling life. Celebrate her and good luck on your trip.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 17:02:41
I am so, so, sorry for this loss. It’s never easy. I will send healing thoughts to you and your family and hold you in my heart.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 16:27:12
So sorry for your loss Denise! Safe travels!!!
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 10:50:18
I am sorry for your loss. How wonderful that she was there for you through the years. Life has its own way of twisting and turning in order for us to grow and it is often painful along our journey.
Positive thoughts are being sent to you from Boulder!
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 08:01:01
I’m so very sorry for your loss, Denise.
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 07:22:14
I’m so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. Paulette
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 03:55:19
Sending heartfelt hugs to you ~ how blessed you are to have enjoyed such a special relationship with such an amazing role model! To be loved unconditionally ~ what a present! xo
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Feb 26, 2013 @ 00:19:38
I haven’t figured out how to “like” – I don’t have a password – but I am praying for you and your extended family, God bless you and your faithfulness to your healing. love, Linda
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 23:48:46
Denise – My prayers are with you and your family. I’ll keep your uncle especially close to my heart. Gentle hugs coming your way.
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 20:29:18
I’m so sorry. 😦
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 20:14:18
I just lost a dear friend to Parkinson’s a few weeks ago and it is painful to say goodbye. His wife has a huge hole where caring for him use to be. Grieving takes time but his wife told me being able to talk about him to others who loved him helps her. I know you will help your uncle through this as well. Take care of yourself.
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 19:56:20
awwwwwww. So sad. Here is a hug.
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 19:07:15
I lost my last aunt this time last year and she filled some of the same needs for me. I know how painful it is to lose someone like her. You have found so much strength, you are so strong. You will get through this difficult week. And the part of her that she gave to you will be with you always.
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 18:54:42
I’m so sorry for your loss! 65 years married is incredible. She sounds like a lovely woman. Be safe on your trip to Oregon and Alaska.
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Feb 25, 2013 @ 18:39:48
Oh Mom, this made me cry all over again 😦
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