Fall is definitely my favorite season.  The beautiful colors combined with warm days and cool nights always make me happy! 

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A Time of Reflection…

It’s also back-to-school time, which always feels like a season of reflection….thinking about milestones.  My kids are grown and gone, but I was thinking recently of my daughter’s first day of kindergarten.  Like so many first-time moms, I stood at the bus stop, my heart torn in two.  I was so proud of my little girl -so smart and so capable.  Yet, I wasn’t ready to let her go off into the big world without me.  Of course I did my best to be brave while she boarded the bus.  But, as soon as it pulled away and I walked home with her little brother and the dog, I couldn’t quite fight off the tears. 

Fast forward to her last day of fifth grade.  I picked up the kids from school that afternoon and it hit me that she was soon headed for middle school.  Her teacher must have recognized the look on my face because she came over, patted my arm and said “She’s really growing up, isn’t she?”  Then those pesky tears showed up again.

 Middle school, I’ve decided, is a unique world all its own.  This was a blur with both of the kids, but of course it ultimately led to high school.  Incredible, I know, but this nearly came as a shock.  How did my kids get this old so fast?  Everyone told me it would happen, but life went by at such dizzying pace I think I lost track.  High school?!?  Driving, dating, jobs, college visits.  Oh my, it made my head spin.

Will I ever be ready…

 Dropping her off at a college an 18-hour drive away nearly did me in.  Her dad and I made it out to the main highway before we both started crying; wondering aloud where the time went.  For better or worse, we’d done our job and she was on her own.  We knew we had to let go, but we weren’t ready. 

 Now, we are fast approaching her wedding day.  Her wedding day!!  She’s been engaged a year, so it’s not like this is a surprise.  But, lately my husband or I will say to each other “How can it be?”  Two weddings in two summers and just like that both our kids will be married.  We’ve been working on a slide show for the reception and there’s been so much reminiscing.  The first day home from the hospital, becoming a big sister, fishing trips, camping adventures, prom nights and the engagement pictures.   

We are eager for the big day, and so proud of her and our future son-in-law.  Yet, there is the tug of my heartstrings as we approach this beautiful milestone.  My daughter, my beautiful sweet baby, all grown up.   I have to let go once again, but it’s still hard and makes me teary.

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How about you?  What have been your milestones of letting go?

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